The Scar
by TheSlashBunny
Summary: When Iruka slept on his stomach, it was there, almost as if on display. The scar. That scar was proof of Iruka’s strength. It was proof that Iruka could protect not only himself but others as well. But Kakashi didn’t need proof of that.


_Note: Written while listening to "The Luckiest" by Ben Folds. And beta'd by my beautiful friend, the-yaoi-squirrel._

* * *

Kakashi hadn't meant to stay out this late. This dinner had been planned for weeks, but dinner had turned into dinner and dessert and then dinner, dessert and a drink or two when the conversation refused to die down. He had to be honest – it'd been nice. He hadn't simply sat and talked with Kurenai in months. She'd been busy with her son, but tonight he knew that she needed some adult company – specifically someone who'd known Asuma. The anniversary of his death was still difficult for her, even after all of these years, and Kakashi had been glad to be the one she could speak to and reminisce with. He had wanted to stay longer, but it was nearing midnight and they each had someone waiting for them at home.

He entered the dark apartment, left his shoes by the door and made his way quietly to the bathroom to wash up before avoiding the squeaky floorboard and finally entering the bedroom. Opening the door, slowly enough to keep it from creaking, he was greeted by a sight that would always bring a smile to his masked face. Iruka was sprawled on his stomach across the bed, sheet tangled at his waist, dark hair fanned out on the pillow. Kakashi loved seeing Iruka like this; it was rare to see him so deeply sleeping. The practical exam he'd proctored at the academy that day must have exhausted him. Yet, Kakashi knew that if anyone else had entered the room, regardless of how tired he was, Iruka would've snapped awake, alert enough to handle any emergency.

It was remarkable, really. Every ninja learned to distinguish between friend and foe, or even one friend and another, while awake or asleep. But what continued to amaze Kakashi was that Iruka felt safe enough in Kakashi's presence that his senses didn't feel the need to alert him at all. Kakashi was the only person who ever got to see Iruka willingly in such a vulnerable state. The level of trust that it required… Kakashi would never understand how he'd earned such a precious thing. And he would always do his best to keep it. Seeing Iruka sleep was one of the most beautiful things the jounin had ever witnessed. Watching that broad back rise and fall in slow, steady breaths was a view he would never tire of and would always love.

It was also a sight that he hated though. He would prefer Iruka sleep in any other position than the one he currently was in. When Iruka slept on his stomach, it was there, almost as if on display. The scar. It had faded with time, but the pale, taut skin still marred the tanned beauty of his lover's back. Kakashi hated that scar. It was a horrible reminder of a betrayal that had hurt his Iruka more than just physically.

Kakashi, now stripped to his boxers, sat on the bed and his hand moved on its own to caress the discolored skin. It wasn't the betrayal that bothered Kakashi the most. It was the reminder of how fragile Iruka really was. Iruka had almost been taken from him, before he even really knew him. The love of his life could've died that night all those years ago – and Kakashi would've never known what they could have had. The thought of them together hadn't even crossed his mind at that point. Iruka had still been just another face in the mission room. Would Kakashi have known that something, some_one_ was missing? Or would he have gone through life alone, never even thinking that there could be more than what he had?

That scar was proof of Iruka's strength. It was proof that Iruka could protect not only himself but others as well. But Kakashi didn't need proof of that. If he had his way, Iruka would never need to fight again, would never again be in any danger. The village that Kakashi had sworn to protect with his life had only become more precious with time – because it was where Iruka was waiting for him. Iruka had given him a new definition of "home." Konoha was always worth protecting, but now Kakashi found himself looking forward to returning the second he stepped foot out the gates. Konoha was where he was happiest, all because he was no longer coming back to an empty apartment. He was coming _home_ to a smiling, scarred face. He understood now that he wasn't just protecting a group of people, his friends, or an ideal – he was protecting his family.

He never would've known any of this happiness if that single strike had hit just one inch higher or two inches deeper. And it scared him. He'd been through war and faced S-class criminals, but one scar - four inches long and two inches wide - filled him with fear.

Would he be there when Iruka needed him most? What if Iruka was in over his head and Kakashi wasn't there to help? What if he failed to protect the most important thing in his life? Would he end up all alone one day? Would Iruka? Someday, would Iruka see a medic at their door, telling him that Kakashi wasn't coming home? Would Kakashi one day put Iruka through the pain that he could still see in Kurenai?

The thought was enough to bring tears to his eyes and his fingertips wavered as they softly traced the lines of the scar.

"'Kashi?" He jerked out of his thoughts as the soft baritone reached him.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you." He retracted his hand as Iruka turned to the side, blearily looking up at him over his shoulder.

"'S ok." Ah. Sleepy Iruka; a rare find indeed. The cutest and cuddliest of all Irukas – and Kakashi's favorite. "I'm jus' glad you're home."

Kakashi returned the soft smile Iruka gave him. _Yeah. I'm home,_ he thought as he climbed under the covers. He wrapped his arms around his love and pulled that terrifying scar to his chest, pressing himself tightly and protectively against the strong back. He buried his unmasked nose in soft brown hair and laid a kiss to the back of Iruka's neck.

"'Kashi?" Iruka whispered sleepily, "What's wrong? Is Kurenai alright?"

"She's fine." Could Iruka really read him that well? "Nothing's wrong."

"You suck at lying." _Only when I'm trying to lie to __**you**__._ Kakashi tightened his embrace slightly before correcting his answer.

"Nothing that can't be fixed by holding you."

He kissed Iruka's shoulder and prayed that Iruka would leave it at that. He could never let Iruka know that the scar bothered him. Iruka would remind Kakashi that he didn't need protection and then would start wearing a shirt to bed in attempt to make Kakashi feel better. Not only would that ruin the lovely view Kakashi went to sleep to every night, it would also cover up the daily reminder of how lucky Kakashi was, and how grateful he should feel, that he had Iruka in his life.

Iruka simply hummed thoughtfully, whispered five words, and fell back asleep in the warm embrace:

"I love you, too, Kakashi."


End file.
